Lesson plans were turned in every Friday. Objectives? Standards? Methods? Materials? Guided practice? Activities might be engaging, appropriate, and enjoyable; what about closure? Although I planned closure activities, it was the student/learner who achieved closure. Even today, God knows I love lessons, learning, and practice. Ah, life lessons. What do I continue to learn?
“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.” T.S. Eliot
Books, entertainment, and activities provide life lessons for me. Recently, I finished a 2nd reading of a book by John Eldridge titled, The Utter Relief of Holiness (what does holiness mean to you?). If you’re not familiar with the works of John and his wife, Stasi, and you’re a lover of God, others, nature. adventure, all things wild, and common sense, you might enjoy their wisdom and insight. Stasi’s book, Captivating, helped me understand why my weird dreaming heart loves great adventures. Last night I sat in awe at the latest episode of The Chosen. Although there will be negative thoughts and naysayers about the particulars of this show, I enjoy the lessons I’m learning through this series. As I ponder and pause, reflect and review, several thoughts from the book, and my own, have surfaced.
“Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.” Hebrews 12:14
“Popular goodness” can ruin one’s thoughts on the work of holiness. Why wouldn’t I strive to be Christ-like and pure in my intentions and daily walk? Is being moral the same as loving God?
My heart-searching “takeaways”:
If I have hatred in my heart, yet give clothes to the homeless, am I GOOD?
Am I more righteous if I’ve been married 40 years but hold resentment towards my spouse?
Is the smug man holier than the man who smokes cigarettes and loves God and others?
If I force my family to pray before a meal and yell at them on the way to church, am I holy?
Do I talk to Jesus one day a week and assume that’s “good enough” to enter his Kingdom?
Do I treat one neighbor with disdain because of politics and think I’m “holier than thou” (what does HOLY mean to YOU?)
Do I continue to repeat sins and habits because I’m allowing triggers in my life rather than staying connected 24-7 to the true source of love and power?
Am I being Christ-like if I’m holding a grudge?
If I say I love Jesus, but not others, am I a true believer? Am I holy?
If my cancer spreads more does it mean I’m being punished? (NO!) (If you’ve watched The Chosen, you might recall season 3’s episode of the conversation between Little James and Jesus–truth and tears!).
Selective morality, as Eldridge pens it, —”keeping the letter of the law while ignoring massive problems in our hearts”(p. 73). Is this holiness? Technical rule-keeping is not holiness. What are the heart lessons you’re learning?
I’m human and I fail. I’m a work-in-progress. Holiness is not for the faint of heart! It’s demanding work!
“Doing the will of God leaves me no time for disputing about His plans.” ― George MacDonald
“We were created for life, love, beauty, joy, laughter, friendship, and adventure. These are the very things God wants for us.” (Eldridge, 2013, p.66).
Motives are behind everything we do. Are we self-protecting? Living in fear? Do we have complete confidence in God or ourselves? Humans like to complicate things. Do we simply love God and others? What lesson are we teaching? What are we trying to learn?
I’ve invited Jesus into broken places in my life. It’s so healing to have him with me. Wholeness. Holiness. I’m not going to waste this Man of God’s ultimate gift. He carried the weight of my sin (and cancer) on his back—it was nailed with him, brutally, on the cross. He carried it ALL for YOU, too. I’ve surrendered it all to him. Guess what? Surrender is a daily, and sometimes, hourly practice! Did I tell you how I love to practice? He expects me to do my best. When I fail, I repent, renounce, (run?) and close the door. I’m not going to “read a verse a day to keep the devil away.” I don’t want comfortable goodness and leisurely doubt. I’m after something far more genuine: the beautiful holiness of Jesus (Eldridge, 2005, p. 86).
Goodness does matter. But it’s grace alone that opens the door to knowing God.
What if we focused on our own paths to holiness? Can we engage others in lessons of love, compassion, kindness, and understanding so that they can achieve closure in CHRIST?
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die;
John 11:25
My cancer journey requires various teachers, learning, plans, activities, and standards…but my expected closure? It won’t change.
“Courage! Take heart! God is here, right here, on his way to put things right and redress all wrongs. He’s on his way! He’ll save you! Springs of water will burst out in the wilderness, streams flow in the desert. Hot sands will become a cool oasis, thirsty ground a splashing fountain. There will be a highway called the Holy Road.
The people God has ransomed will come back on this road. They’ll sing as they make their way home to Zion, unfading halos of joy encircling their heads, welcomed home with gifts of joy and gladness as all sorrows and signs scurry into the night.
Isaiah 35:3-10 (TM)
Seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand.
St. Augustine
Have faith🤍
Have you heard of NET, yet?🦓
Thank you, family and friends, for your patience and support. Since my last celebration of my wonderful parents, I’ve had family visits, birthday celebrations, an anniversary gathering, and a treatment day/doctor visit. My adult kids and grandkids visited SW MO. More memories were made to treasure! Trust me when I say the pics of my grandkids are the cutest ever! 🙂 There were battles with sickness and life events. Life will always give new lessons!
My latest PET scan showed lymph nodes impacted; treatments must continue to keep them stable. The largest bone lesions are stubborn; yet, I have wins in the small ones! Future scans will determine necessary steps. Am I disappointed that the cancer can’t just DISAPPEAR? Yes. Treatments do have side effects for me (some new). But I have a LIFE. I’m at peace about it.
A week ago, Saturday, LACNETS held their National Conference. It humbled me that my story was requested to be shared. It was the hardest thing I’ve written in a long time! This organization, including its leaders, fellow cancer patients, and experts, enhances my life. Thank you for believing, supporting, and rallying for all of us. There isn’t a family I know that hasn’t been impacted by cancer or disease. I’m praying for your situation and supporting you as you do me.
This video belongs to LACNETS. Written by K.L. Hale and filmed by Autumn Girgin (Visit Autumn at Girgisaur Productions). Autumn, thank you for all you did to make my story come to “life”. If you or a family member have Neuroendocrine Cancer, I encourage you to visit LACNETS. Feel free to reach out to me for support!
This video, belonging to LACNETS, will stay static on my “About Me” page. Although there are things I’d like to edit or change, the message stays the same–Be an advocate for yourself and others. If you feel something is wrong, seek help. There is hope!
Cancer wasn’t in my plans. We can make the best-laid plans, including amazing activities based on great standards, but in the end, what will closure look like? What did you learn? What do you hope to gain? Did I tell you I love learning?Oh, and I love you, too.
“Love is the beauty of the soul.”
St. Augustine
“We are all very anxious to be understood, and it is very hard not to be. But there is one thing much more necessary.’ What is that, grandmother?’ To understand other people.’ Yes, grandmother. I must be fair – for if I’m not fair to other people, I’m not worth being understood myself. I see.”
Flannel with Faith 
You must be logged in to post a comment.