quote Archives - Flannel with Faith

September was slippery and swift. Schools, students, and sickness. Reunions, rest, and reflection. My optimism hasn’t surrendered.

Welcome, October!

“Yet, I can face the winter with calm. I suppose I had forgotten what it was really like. I had been thinking of the winter as a horrid wet, dreary time fit only for professional football. Now I can see other things—crisp and sparkling days, long pleasant evenings, cheery fires. Good work shall be done this winter. Life shall be lived well. The end of the summer is not the end of the world. Here’s to October.”
A.A. Milne, “A Word for Autumn”

Sweet Surprise

She knew I was coming to stay. Picking her up from school with her Dad was a surprise! “Grammy K!” Her precious tiny voice boomed as she was escorted out of the building. Grasped in her tiny fingers was a picture she had started for me. Her sweet 5-year-old voice excitedly shared her day. Cloud Nine isn’t high enough to describe how I felt. Elated? Elevated? It was pure heavenly. Talk about optimism!

Hours later she was tumbling, balancing, stretching, and swinging at gymnastics! It was pure joy to soak in the end of September with this doll. The trips to and from school were a delight! You know how I love schools so imagine my love for HER combined with the school! How will October top that? Like always, I’m optimistic.

Seasonal Social

Liberty, Missouri put on quite a show. The heat showed up with thousands of others. It was the quintessential heart of America hometown parade. Whitley and I found a spot to sit “criss cross applesauce” on the street. Floats with singers, preachers, police officers, and pets. Marching bands, football teams, and more dance squads than one could count. Sweat was rolling like the candy being thrown. The swing ride was a perfect way to cool off!

SKILLED SPECIALIST

There were years of pain and unknowns B.C. (before cancer). It’s been 3 years A.D. (after diagnosis) and they’ve been filled with…SO MUCH (including love & laughter). Could they tell what I was thinking in the back seat? Did they know what this meant to me? This wasn’t just a 30-minute trip into the heart of K.C. to see my new cancer specialist. It was a life-long trip within the heart of me.

The man driving me to St. Luke’s was my 2nd newborn whom I held with pride decades ago. My heart thought of his older brother working in Japan. Memories of yesteryear hurried through my head like the 70 mph speed limit. From his birth to meeting my precious daughter-in-love riding shotgun. Their lives, moves, and the birth of their baby. My precious granddaughter. Suddenly, I was in Alaska again with my other amazing “baby boy”, daughter-in-love, and two little grands. Before we ever got near the railroad tracks where he works, tears flowed like the Missouri River.

You see, this wasn’t JUST a drive to an appointment. It represented everything good about life and the passage of time. That 30-minute drive reminded me of how 30 minutes in the past was the difference between life and death, a diagnosis and good health, a good decision and a poor choice, unemployment and a new career, walking to barely crawling, fully awake to sound asleep. Life can turn on a dime in 30 minutes (or LESS!).

The team at St. Luke’s met us with kindness, professionalism, empathy, and humor. The doctor’s gentle manner and expertise was realized right away. We shared tears when the word “hope” was highlighted as he showed the “kids” the new liver lesions that had returned. HOPE. You know how much hope I already have (and how I throw it all around like falling leaves and glitter!).

What’s ahead? Another treatment here (and blood draw) next week to help strengthen bones. I’ll head back to Kansas City the end of October for scans. It’s not strange to me that I DON’T have “scanxiety”. When a statement like “this is a marathon, not a sprint” is repeated consistently it sticks! You know what else is sticking? My faith, resilience, and utter relief in the Holy Spirit and my Savior.

So, September ended up pretty sticky. Sticky hot, stick-with-it attitude, and a bit of a sticky sickly feeling from traveling. Guess what else is sticky? My faith, resilience, and utter relief in the Holy Spirit and my Savior. If YOU find it, know it, live it, and relish in it, there’s nothing that can undo it! It’s best to stick with it for it’s a power that’s unexplainable, undeniable, and also, my lifelong love story. There’s nothing else for me to BE in October but…optimistic!

Friends, thank you for your patience as I navigate my journey. Between appointments, daily tasks, and inconsistency in health, I sometimes struggle to keep up in communication. Do you know how much you mean to me? Even more, do you know how LOVED YOU ARE? If you or a loved one suffers from a chronic illness, cancer, or any disease that impacts your livelihood, please reach out for help. YOU do NOT need to suffer! We have a Savior that redeemed us! The great exchange! The sinless Savior died for us that continue to be messy humans. His righteousness died for our unrighteousness! I’m not talking religion–I’m speaking about a relationship. Ah, the great surrender.

THAT is the reason I plan on having an OPTIMISTIC OCTOBER.

Have hope. Find faith. YOU ARE LOVED. 💚

Embracing imperfection with faith, flannel, & fresh air

K.L. Hale

It’s a lot to digest.

Neuroendocrine cancer is diagnosed in 7 out of 100,000 individuals (LACNETS, 2024). It’s rare and can occur anywhere you have endocrine glands. Typically misdiagnosed, it can go undetected for YEARS. 🦓

The massive tumors that caused pain and wreaked havoc on my systems are out for the time being (bones, be nice, I need you!). What can and will I digest now? If you battle any disease or cancer of the “gut” you’re probably nodding your head right now (I’m sorry if you suffer from cancer, Crohn’s,’ IBS, Celiac, fatty liver, gallbladder issues, etc…).

Rather than eating a huge plate of information at a time, I’m taking small bites. It’s better for my digestion. ALL of this is hard to stomach.

My plate is full.

In the last two weeks, I’ve devoted many hours to researching and learning about nutrition and the NET diet. It’s a good thing I love learning! Just as we’re all zebras, so are our diets and “trigger” foods. All of our calorie needs are different based on the stages of our lives (treatment times, post-surgery, exercise, illness, etc…).Dietician Sina Teskey, M.S., R.D., C.D., shared with our LACNETS group on Wednesday, “Before worrying about what we shouldn’t eat, worry about what we SHOULD eat.” Dairy and meat should only be one-third of my plate (a SMALL plate). “Think of a plate from 1980, not today’s huge plate,” Sina said. We all need several servings of fruits and vegetables per day. My small meal plate (or full small bowl) now includes fiber, protein, greens, and whole grains. For years meat was part of my diet. Several years ago I began meatless days. Since my surgery, I’ve eaten grass-fed beef a handful of times. My protein source is mainly plant-based. My go-to sources include chicken, seafood, Greek yogurt, smoothies, and homemade protein shakes (which are ridiculously priced like most groceries if bought). There is no magic diet that fits everyone. I’m adding foods a few at a time to discover what is digestible and good for me. As my dietician Lydia said yesterday, “The foods that fuel what I love to do.”

“Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is.” – Irish Proverb

Can I avoid processed foods? Let me process that. When I’m receiving treatments, I’m going to need calories—and sometimes pronto! I’ll not open up a new can writing about the COSTS of food; particularly the healthy choices. But for many who can’t grow their own, or afford to buy healthy foods, processed foods are quick and easy. Sometimes we have to pick the best of the worst if calories are needed. I’m trying to be SMART. Why can’t I eat nuts now? Which bread should I buy? Should I EVEN eat bread? How many pancreatic enzymes do I take with each meal? Sugar? What a sweet topic! Of course, the more natural, the better, BUT like it was shared, “If you’re at a party and there’s cake…well, eat the cake if you want!” Don’t deprive yourself of life, but don’t be a glutton. Isn’t it all a balance? It’s a lot to digest.

Sometimes you can do everything right and still get cancer.

From the outside, with my rooted hair, makeup, and a smile, I’m a picture of health. Today has been challenging (a trip to the store to buy needed items that were out of stock, a virus, fatigue, mouth and throat sores) YET, kindness was kindled in a line at the store. The heat from combustible compassion around me gave me hope. The clouds in my mind lifted as I drove home exhausted and desiring to sit and finish this piece.

Does anyone else spend most of their day in their kitchen, deciding what to eat and when, preparing, cleaning, or even worse, in their bathroom most of the day? Do you pray that ANY event is scheduled during your “good” hours (no stomach issues, belly isn’t aching, no pain, no fatigue)? Do you avoid social gatherings due to illness? Or possible pain episodes? How’s your digestion?

I’ll keep digesting decisions with discernment and due diligence, chewing change carefully, and swallowing sweetness that won’t make me sweaty and swollen!

It’s a lot to digest. So, if I feast, it’ll be on faith.💚

A huge THANK YOU to the LACNETS organization for their podcast and special ZOOM session with Dietician Sina Teskey, M.S., R.D., C.D.,. To my dietician, Lydia Martinez (MS, RD, LD), thank you for our amazing visit yesterday. Without the support of my Heavenly Father, family, doctors, friends like you reading this, my support group, and amazing organization, I’d be malnourished!