September was slippery and swift. Schools, students, and sickness. Reunions, rest, and reflection. My optimism hasn’t surrendered.
Welcome, October!
“Yet, I can face the winter with calm. I suppose I had forgotten what it was really like. I had been thinking of the winter as a horrid wet, dreary time fit only for professional football. Now I can see other things—crisp and sparkling days, long pleasant evenings, cheery fires. Good work shall be done this winter. Life shall be lived well. The end of the summer is not the end of the world. Here’s to October.”
A.A. Milne, “A Word for Autumn”
Sweet Surprise
She knew I was coming to stay. Picking her up from school with her Dad was a surprise! “Grammy K!” Her precious tiny voice boomed as she was escorted out of the building. Grasped in her tiny fingers was a picture she had started for me. Her sweet 5-year-old voice excitedly shared her day. Cloud Nine isn’t high enough to describe how I felt. Elated? Elevated? It was pure heavenly. Talk about optimism!
Hours later she was tumbling, balancing, stretching, and swinging at gymnastics! It was pure joy to soak in the end of September with this doll. The trips to and from school were a delight! You know how I love schools so imagine my love for HER combined with the school! How will October top that? Like always, I’m optimistic.
Seasonal Social
Liberty, Missouri put on quite a show. The heat showed up with thousands of others. It was the quintessential heart of America hometown parade. Whitley and I found a spot to sit “criss cross applesauce” on the street. Floats with singers, preachers, police officers, and pets. Marching bands, football teams, and more dance squads than one could count. Sweat was rolling like the candy being thrown. The swing ride was a perfect way to cool off!
SKILLED SPECIALIST
There were years of pain and unknowns B.C. (before cancer). It’s been 3 years A.D. (after diagnosis) and they’ve been filled with…SO MUCH (including love & laughter). Could they tell what I was thinking in the back seat? Did they know what this meant to me? This wasn’t just a 30-minute trip into the heart of K.C. to see my new cancer specialist. It was a life-long trip within the heart of me.
The man driving me to St. Luke’s was my 2nd newborn whom I held with pride decades ago. My heart thought of his older brother working in Japan. Memories of yesteryear hurried through my head like the 70 mph speed limit. From his birth to meeting my precious daughter-in-love riding shotgun. Their lives, moves, and the birth of their baby. My precious granddaughter. Suddenly, I was in Alaska again with my other amazing “baby boy”, daughter-in-love, and two little grands. Before we ever got near the railroad tracks where he works, tears flowed like the Missouri River.
You see, this wasn’t JUST a drive to an appointment. It represented everything good about life and the passage of time. That 30-minute drive reminded me of how 30 minutes in the past was the difference between life and death, a diagnosis and good health, a good decision and a poor choice, unemployment and a new career, walking to barely crawling, fully awake to sound asleep. Life can turn on a dime in 30 minutes (or LESS!).
The team at St. Luke’s met us with kindness, professionalism, empathy, and humor. The doctor’s gentle manner and expertise was realized right away. We shared tears when the word “hope” was highlighted as he showed the “kids” the new liver lesions that had returned. HOPE. You know how much hope I already have (and how I throw it all around like falling leaves and glitter!).
What’s ahead? Another treatment here (and blood draw) next week to help strengthen bones. I’ll head back to Kansas City the end of October for scans. It’s not strange to me that I DON’T have “scanxiety”. When a statement like “this is a marathon, not a sprint” is repeated consistently it sticks! You know what else is sticking? My faith, resilience, and utter relief in the Holy Spirit and my Savior.
So, September ended up pretty sticky. Sticky hot, stick-with-it attitude, and a bit of a sticky sickly feeling from traveling. Guess what else is sticky? My faith, resilience, and utter relief in the Holy Spirit and my Savior. If YOU find it, know it, live it, and relish in it, there’s nothing that can undo it! It’s best to stick with it for it’s a power that’s unexplainable, undeniable, and also, my lifelong love story. There’s nothing else for me to BE in October but…optimistic!
Friends, thank you for your patience as I navigate my journey. Between appointments, daily tasks, and inconsistency in health, I sometimes struggle to keep up in communication. Do you know how much you mean to me? Even more, do you know how LOVED YOU ARE? If you or a loved one suffers from a chronic illness, cancer, or any disease that impacts your livelihood, please reach out for help. YOU do NOT need to suffer! We have a Savior that redeemed us! The great exchange! The sinless Savior died for us that continue to be messy humans. His righteousness died for our unrighteousness! I’m not talking religion–I’m speaking about a relationship. Ah, the great surrender.
THAT is the reason I plan on having an OPTIMISTIC OCTOBER.
Have hope. Find faith. YOU ARE LOVED. 💚
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