A Year in Yearning

Rain fell softly at first. Each drop gifted a unique reflection. The thunderclap and lightning strikes reminded me how fast, furious, and loud change can happen. Out of nowhere yearning grew intense like the sudden storm. My mind went to one year ago.

May 11th, 2022-Ozark North Elementary–Guess what? Finn and I go BACK NEXT WEEK (God-willing!)

The 3rd-grade students were such delights. Attentively they sat listening to the writing process presentation (even though Finn TRIED to distract them🐾) Despite the tough winter, spring had sprung with new hope! Another book in the works, future visits with family, traveling around my state, and a renewal of spirit. The day’s celebration ended with cheeseburgers (one for me, one for Finn). That night the pain grew intense. It wouldn’t go away like typical. Within 12 hours I needed a ride to the hospital.

It’s been a year of learning. And yearning. There are dark days. Light breaks through. Family is beside me on the days I think are the end. A new day dawns and they’re still beside me. Most days I stand alone. It’s strange. One day I’m strong and the next day, I can’t move (for example-yesterday versus today). With eager expectation, I’ll seek goodness. Hourly, I’ll count my blessings. I’ll accept the things I cannot change. I might yearn. I’ll definitely learn. We have a beautiful relationship, Faith and me. We know each other so well. No matter what, FAITH NEVER LEAVES.

In a world spinning and sputtering with disasters, deaths, mass shootings, divisiveness, and tragedies…a crazy world filled with messy humans (like me) doing absurd things with little regard to how it impacts others or any thought of how to be civil…in a world that is still filled with beauty and simplicity if we choose to see…how do you find faith? It’s Mental Health Awareness Month-can we do our part by being aware? Put down the phone, look around, call family and friends, and tell someone they’re loved.

For, in the end, love will win. 💚

Have you heard of NET, Yet? 🦓

This Friday, May 12th, I will “celebrate” my first anniversary of this diagnosis by appearing on a local morning show, Ozarks FOX AM (for those on Facebook-@OzarksFOXAM) sometime during the 8am-9am hour, C.S.T. Gage Becker (illustrator of Faith and Finley Tour Missouri) will accompany me to visit about our book journey. You might see “double” with an appearance by my twin. The easiest thing in my life would be to hide. I’d rather write. Not be seen. IF my journey can just help ONE, I must follow the call. Without the support of my family and friends, I wouldn’t be here. Thank you all so much. I love you.

The Springfield ArtsFest lifted my spirits! I hope you enjoy this salute to amazing local Ozarks artists!

Have faith 💚