In March I began a series titled Praiseworthy People. Today I’d like to introduce you to my friends, Tom & Lisa Bajoras. Although I’ve only known them for several years, they have made an inspirational impact in my cancer and creativity journey. Through Tom’s compositions and their shared faith, they still find beauty in the midst of life’s hardest milestones-his NET cancer journey.
Meet Tom Bajoras
It is an honor and privilege to introduce Tom Bajoras, composer/musician and fellow NET cancer thriver. Tom’s gift of music has touched the lives of others for over three decades. What does music mean to Tom?
“My oldest memory is of music. I was about three years old, and I remember music in a church. Later that day, I went to the piano in our living room. I was so small that my mother had to lift me up onto the piano bench. I then pounded on the keys, trying to re-create what I’d felt that morning in church. Ever since then, whenever I write music, I’ve been trying to communicate that feeling of being in the presence of beauty. Throughout my life, music has been a constant companion, in good times and in difficult times. Music has been with me at every significant milestone, whether it be my wedding day or the night that my father died. Music elevates joy, and it eases sorrow. And that brings us back to January 2015, the start of the most difficult time I’d ever gone through.“-Tom Bajoras
His Diagnosis
“On January 2, 2015, I had a life-changing experience: I almost died. I was suddenly hospitalized with internal bleeding caused by a neuroendocrine tumor (NET) on my pancreas, which had metastasized my liver. The tumors were crushing my spleen and pressing against a major vein, causing a life-threatening medical emergency. Thanks to some quick and creative thinking by a team of doctors, the bleeding was stopped, but I would need surgery as soon as possible to remove the tumors. And after that… well, no one really knew what would happen after that. One step at a time. The first step was to go home and get as strong and healthy as possible to prepare for surgery. ”
Tom’s marathon began after a major surgery to remove several organs and tumors.
“I’d be lying if I said my faith in God hasn’t been challenged, but that faith has emerged from the ordeal stronger, more mature, and more complex. Similarly, my relationships have deepened with my friends, family, and especially Lisa, my amazing wife, who has walked (and continues to walk) with me on this journey.”
Tom Bajoras
This idea of being “surprised by beauty” became essential to getting through this period. For someone used to a very high level of productivity, it required a complete shift of perspective to accept that on some days a short walk around the neighborhood with my wife would be all I accomplished that day. I remember one day as we were walking, I saw a flower, and I said to Lisa, “Look at that flower! It’s amazing!” It was a common kind of flower I’d probably seen a thousand times before, but this time it really did look amazing. In this moment I realized that even on the worst of days I could find at least one beautiful thing to be thankful for.
Meet Tom’s wife, Lisa
Lisa isn’t JUST an advocate, wife, daughter, TWIN, and wonderful aunt! She has over twelve years of experience as a nurse practitioner hospitalist prior to her husband’s diagnosis with advanced metastatic neuroendocrine pancreatic tumor (NET) in January 2015. With expertise as a healthcare professional, caregiver, and health coach for NET patients, she offers a multifaceted perspective to the Neuroendocrine Cancer Foundation (formerly LACNETS).
As the Director of Programs & Outreach, Ms. Yen works closely with her team to whip up content for the monthly educational meetings and the big yearly patient education conference. She also gets creative with initiatives like NETCONNECT, the NCF Health Coaching Program, and runs a fun weekly virtual support group for NET, plus a monthly one for caregivers. For all her hard work, she snagged the Monica Warner Award in 2020. Her main goal? To make life better for everyone dealing with NET.
Tom’s Heart-felt Composition
On April 16th, Tom & Lisa celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary. In honor of Lisa and their marriage Tom composed a composition, “Our Book, Open Halfway Through” (which will be available on Spotify, Apple, etc. on May 21st; performed by Tom’s friend, Chris Weldon).
The piece is a narrative work based on our marriage. It features six themes representing different emotional states. Three of these are from pieces I previously wrote for her—”Butterfly & Tiger,” “Wedding Processional,” and “Bells”—while the other three are new. Throughout the piece, two themes often occur simultaneously to communicate various combinations of emotions. Additionally, I used a floating barline and frequent meter changes to represent the uncertainty of life and marriage.
The title refers to a poem by Wisława Szymborska: “Every beginning is only a sequel, after all, and the book of events is always open halfway through.” To me, this suggests that all moments of our lives are connected; in a mindfully lived life, we never close the book, but welcome the next page while being grateful for the last. This felt like the perfect description of our marriage.-Tom Bajoras
Tom’s Current Journey
Please join me in sending prayers, well-wishes, and blessings to Tom and Lisa as they travel this week for his 2nd round of liver tumor treatments. Although Tom and Lisa are thrilled to be celebrating his 11th year since diagnosis, he continues to receive multiple treatments that have had huge impacts on both of them. Specifically, pray for Tom’s nausea, weight, blood, bone marrow, and staying infection free! Also, for Lisa’s health and stamina. Through multiple surgeries, procedures, and drainage of lung fluid, he and Lisa continue to find the beauty in everyday lives. They support their family members and continue traveling to seek out further treatments. Faith guides them and they seek to enjoy the beauty and find joy so that cancer and the appointments don’t become their life. Their two furry kids keep them seeking fun and the great outdoors!
Below are links to Tom’s amazing music! You’ll soon become a fan, too!
On Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/tom-bajoras/302512692
On Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/44bXOwJG19kwDp2chBPi6j
Tom was kind enough to allow me to record a few prayers with his beautiful music. These guide my meditations and propel my praise to our Heavenly Father!
America the Beautiful – Flannel with Faith
The song, “Sorrow”, in the prayer is in a minor key. His song, “Joy”, is in a major key. When joined together they share a single chord–yet, missing the middle note. Would it be a major or a minor? Tom shared, “Where Sorrow and Joy meet, there’s a moment where it’s both, and that’s the moment I’ve been learning to live in.”
Friends, may we pause long enough to look and find the praiseworthy people and remarkable grace all around us. To slow down and see the quiet heroes and steady lights that help us on our walks.
Keep the Faith. You are loved. 💚
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