Mastering March

On By K.L. HaleIn Essay, newsletter

Tuesday was beautiful, windy, and wild! It was the last day of February-the recycling center was open! A small wooden crate fell on my back (I’m fine!), my elbow decided to ram into the metal rim of the cardboard bin, an ink pen gurgled out ITS ENTIRE ink supply (a plaque stating “Lean Not Unto Your Own Understanding” fell off off my desk and landed perfectly on the cap🙃), an eco-friendly disinfectant bubbled up and exploded its germ-fighting magic mist, and Finn decided to find something “smelly” in the yard. It was time for an impromptu bath and much-needed haircut I’d been putting off (for Finn, not me ;-).

My hands were ink-stained and tears flowed down my cheek. It was a “perfect” ending to February! Finn, sitting there 1/2 the girl she was before, licked my hand and looked into my eyes. I couldn’t help but start laughing through the tears. She just gets me. Cancer didn’t seem so bad. Time to recycle my thoughts into something new. “You did it, Karla! You got through February!” There were celebrations amidst confusion, pains with perseverance, happiness amidst haphazard happenings, tears, trials, giggles through goofs, laughter, love, and a testimony of faith tangled with the trials. Tomorrow is March. A new beginning. The next hour provided amazing “snaps” of my grandiose kids and grandkids. Friends and family checking in on me heard only my hope. The first 3 days, along with a newsletter, have been mastered.

Bring it on, March💚 May YOUR March be filled with hope, good health, love, and peace. We may not know what tomorrow holds, but I know WHO holds it. Do you know how loved you are?💚

Have Faith💚

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The AMAZING DHH class of Holland Elementary! Finley will return and serve as an emotional therapy pet! Yay!
Finley just being her. It was so great to do our thing together!

Thank you, Dr. Seuss, for inspiring me in so many ways!

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72 thoughts on “Mastering March”

  1. Ginger Salvatore

    Hahaha! When I first started reading your post I thought it must be a script from a long ago Abbott & Costello movie! You sure know how to wrap a month up with a bang!

    Kudos to you and Finley for getting to the school and giving those beautiful kids a day to remember. Finley is so special she doesn’t need to be seen or heard. Those kids could feel her love and her magic power to make them feel happy with the touch of their fingertips. Finley looks like she’s in her element sitting so proudly on your lap. And look at her all spankin’ clean with her new “do”! Just precious.

    I can feel the hope and excitement in your words today Karla. Lord knows you worked mighty hard to get to this point. And I have no doubt you shall be rewarded. My prayers will continue for you to continue to gain strength, for lab results to keep getting better, and for YOU to have the last laugh over cancer.

    Sending healing hugs, love and my friendship as always. I’m so glad we met. You are a force to be reckoned with. I love your spirit and your tenacity. You got this girl.

    Hugs and belly rubs to sweet Miss Finley. She deserves an extra treat or two….for enduring the bath and haircut!

    Ginger 💞

    Sent from my iPad

    >

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    1. Ginger! Oh, my friend, Finn’s haircut. Don’t look close. 🤪 you remember the song, “Just put one foot in front of the other… 🎶 from Rudolph I think? Well, I was singing that getting out my door this week. That one day was a great banged up ending! Oh my. You should see my elbow. Lol.
      The precious girl in the front is blind and deaf~she felt for Finnie and the teachers were thrilled how her face lit up! I didn’t want to leave.
      A few minutes ago it was time for medicine. Everything started to ache. Even my hands. It’s so strange how we all can adapt to our challenges. Those kids, and so many here such as you, keep inspiring me. There are times, like yesterday afternoon, I go down a rabbit hole of my cancer and looking up symptoms or ask, “why do I hurt here?” “Why am I feeling this?” And then I think, “I’m FEELING it. I’m fully conscious and FEELING.” Then I move on. Usually with a silly background song in my head or a memory of my kids and grandkids playing nonstop in the video section of my mind. Lol
      I DO want to have the last laugh. And I hope we’re on here laughing together!
      I’ve given Finn some extra treats. She’s so much tinier and fragile without hair so I must keep her “fluffed” up, lol. We love you, Ginger! 🐾🤗🥰💕

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    1. Thank you, Kelley. I miss you and pray daily for you, your Mom, and family. I think of you in your new position. I thought of you when I went to school yesterday. Sending you love and hugs, too! 💕🙏🏻🥰

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  6. You posts are always uplifting and inspiring. March is here and you are marching on. Good for you. I love your stories and photos of your visit to the classroom. Keep on keeping on, Karla. You are and example to all of us in every way. My prayers are with you on this journey.
    dwight

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    1. Dwight, thank you for such a thoughtful and kind response! I may have told you this before, but you’ve always reminded me of several of my uncles. Your encouragement, and writing, keeps me inspired too! I’m glad you enjoyed the pictures. I believe in the prayers and thank you both for remembering me! I’ll keep on keeping on! Stay blessed!

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  7. Oh dear lady, what a group in the picture. The energy is amazing. Must be all that love you guys (you and Fin), spread so easily. No wonder you enjoy that so much, they just soak it in, waiting for the next wonder your heart will share. Profoundly beautiful.
    And I hear your heart kind lady, tested…and some days seemingly tested again. I shall send some of my love, the unconditional stuff that He spreads far and wide. I don’t think He will mind if I put it in a little pink cloud to cushion your journey. Big pink hug my friend, my heart is with you for the end of the month…wait, no…all month…and next…oh forever. Well, it is His love, it never diminishes Karla, holding you in His arms. May it ever be so.
    Much love and light my friend, you got this, that light in your heart will ever be lit from the beauty of Him within you. xox 😀❤️🙏🏽

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    1. Mark, I think you and Ginger need to co-author a motivational book. 💕I’ll take the pink cloud for cushion and the unconditional love is received, felt, and reciprocated. Your kind words to me makes me float as a cloud! As soon as I walk into a school and feel the energy it fills my soul and body~it provides everything I need to deliver love and great care! I often think of Jesus surrounded by kids; how he wants us to have the faith of a child. How he gathered them-“Come unto me”…he wasn’t going to hypnotize, indoctrinate, or do voo-doo and talk poo poo. Lol. He just loved them. He cared. I wanna be like him. To kids. To adults. And when I need discipline, he provides that too. But the love and energy are exactly what keeps me going! You heard the tests of my heart and you know that which keeps me going! Finn and I are sending oodles and noodles of love and fluffy goodness across the big pond! We’re waving! Can you see us? 🐾 👋🏻 we love you!💕🙏🏻 thank you for being you!

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      1. I can see it in the children’s eyes dear lady, you can so easily see it when they smile. Each and every one of them, even with many setbacks can compensate with their gifts inside. And also, as you said, with Fin in their arms they light up big time. It would be a great thing to watch, each and every one open to it all 🤣
        I too had Ginger barracking for me when I went down for a while. She is that Angel that rocks up, gives a great smile to begin that return road and nudges us when we don’t take our medicine 😂 Yes mom! 🤣 And I wouldn’t have it any other way. As for the book…I haven’t even written my own yet. You my dear friend have stood up and expressed yours so I better get on with it or I’ll not have filled my contract for down here 😂 But Ginger can proceed with hers and that healers heart. Courage of a lion and very much appreciated for it too ❤️🙏🏽
        Catching the love from you both Karla, and most certainly can see both your hearts. To which a beautiful thank you. Take care dear lady, I hope you both enjoy the pink cloud 😀❤️🙏🏽

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      2. Beautiful words, Mark!! I giggled when you wrote, “I better get on with it…”. My book was a simple children’s rhyming book. THE CHALLENGE was learning the software and everything that came with self-publishing. I had no idea how much I would learn. Even as simple as it was, the editing stage took forever. Editing seems to never end! If I write another one it might be for adults. I do dream of completing my series as I was on page 6 of 32 of my next book “Faith and Finley-Find Your Park!”. I look back to that start last year and was amazed at how far I went. My mo-jo left, Mark. Now, my purpose feels different in my writing. That’s just the way God sharpens my skills! Aww,…courage of a lion. I’m a baby lion with a baby roar! But still trying to be courageous so I’ll take Mama Lion’s (Ginger’s) advice! I’m glad you feel our love and care! Still floating on pink clouds here! ☁️☁️😶‍🌫️❤️💕💕🙏🤗🐶🐶🐾💚

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  8. atimetoshare.me

    You are a rock star Karla. I know that every day is a blessing and each day you put yourself out there to encourage and inspire others. Keep shining your beautiful light.

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    1. Thank you, Mama K. 🥰 that’s so sweet. It felt good to do it. Finn inspired me, as do the kids. I really hope to encourage, even if just one. I’ve been encouraged by so many that have had worst things happen in life, yet they carry on. It gives me strength. 💕🙏🏻🥰🥰

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  10. Karla I’m so happy that you are tolerating the radiation and that it is looking promising! I’ve been praying along with the women at church… I believe in miracles! How wonderful that Finley was able to bring a smile to the students and to that one girl especially! (and I have to admit that your string of mishaps was amusing – in retrospect!)

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    1. Thank you, Val. I had to take a LONG break. Admittedly, I’ve had to give a lot of worry to God over the lasting impacts of treatment. It’s tough. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t dreading the next one. I know how it impacts me. Statistically, this cancer returns. I’m not much into statistics about health as I know a GREAT PHYSICIAN. I think starting with Chemo was too aggressive; yet, I know why they did that. I’m very realistic. I don’t want to damage my bone marrow to a point of no return. I just have two more. Let’s get these tumors gone and keep me going. I think why I’m doing so well right now is because I’m 14 weeks out of treatment. That’s the longest I’ve gone since being diagnosed. Will you let the sweet warriors know that I need specific prayers about my body’s tolerance to treatment? Blood, flu, leukemia, blood clots, joint pain,…the normal things I have that have been more emphasized with chemicals.
      Finley was so fun, Val. I bet Mochi would love it, too. My string of mishaps definitely prepared me for those next two days!
      Are you and Sparky rested up well now from the trip? How’s Mochi? Stay well and blessed my friend! Much love!

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    1. I’m with you, Lauri! He teaches me to, as I say to some of my close friends, “sharpen my skills!” These situations truly define that which I depend on for sanity, strength, and saving! Thank you, God! ❤️ Thank you, Lauri, for reading and sharing!

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  13. I’m not sure I would have described that day, your Feb. 28, the way you did. You gave it such grace. You consistently remind me that attitude is a choice as you choose humor, kindness, gratitude, and love in the face of some real and heavy challenges. It is apparent that your choice of lightheartedness is why you have the buoyancy to top every hurdle. Well, that and the Holy Spirit within you, reminding you (and you listening!) that you are loved, created for a purpose, and held by an omniscient Savior.
    💚☘️💚 Happy March!

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    1. Thank you, Mama. My attitude has gone through many growth stages. Someone shared recently that God revealed this cancer just when I was ready to handle it. There have been times in my life my attitude was pathetic! I’m so thankful to God for his grace which allows me to grow mine. He appreciate humor, which I’m glad, since I do love to laugh. He’s taught me to be kind. I’ve dealt with SO many situations in my young life. Some are just unbelievable and I reflect to think, “Why?” I once read, “You can have understanding or you can have Jesus. If you insist on understanding, you usually lose both.” (Stasi Eldridge from her book, “Becoming Myself”–I just sent this quote to a friend by email). Suffering has been the door that has drawn me into a deeper intimacy with Jesus. Some might not choose it to be so. I don’t regret walking through HIS door. Listening is so important to me. I pray about it consistently. You said it beautifully, Mama, “…loved, created for a purpose, and held by an omniscient Savior.” Your thoughtfulness and spirit-led words gave me happy tears. Thank you so much. 💚💕

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  14. you are doing the March to the finish and i’m so in awe of you and Finn, Karla. Love how tears and flow through the laughs my dear friend. You are a miracle in process and always deliver the message of gods love that flows through you🦋 Im marching with you side by side and ready to carry you if need be! 💞

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    1. Hi Cindy! That’s so sweet and kind to say. It’s truly a miracle I’m here and I have to keep living as such! I’m glad you feel my love and the love of God. It’s what I hope and pray about! The offering of carrying me is heart-touching. In many ways, I am lifted. Sending you love and hugs. I pray your Dad and the rest of your family are doing well. Happy belated bday. I saw what you did on your post as a gift to us. You are a selfless and loving person. It didn’t surprise me you did that. May YOU keep LEAPING through life with the contagious love and enthusiasm you spread to us. Much love, Cindy! 💚

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    1. Matt, I just love and appreciate all the years you have given, and continue to give, to students and any adult who needs help! It would be a pleasure to sit in a class. I’m sure Finley will have more stories to tell. I’m glad you have seen the differences it makes! Stay blessed and well, brother! Prayers for your daily challenges as you go about giving of yourself to so many causes!

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  16. Karla, what a breath of fresh air reading all of the mishaps! I can see you crying and laughing at the same time. I am so happy you were able to visit a classroom again and read your book to those precious students! I absolutely love the photo, and you are beautiful sitting there
    with Finley! You are courageous, my sweet friend. Sending love, hugs, and prayers ♥️🤗🙏🏻♥️

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    1. Sweet Pam, I’m so glad to “see” you. You and Butch are in my daily prayers. How are you all doing? I can imagine all the preparations at the Cottage and property for spring. I can’t wait to see and read! Thank you for your love, prayers, support, and precious comments. It was so great to have my picture taken with all those heroes sitting around me. It boosts me! ;-)!!! I know where this courage is coming from, Pam. I know God expects me to do some work, too. But truly, the power is mostly HIM. I just count backwards and make myself get up…Mel Robbins has a 5 second rule, I start at 10 and count back, lol…10,9,8,7,…God has me ready, usually, by 0! There have been days that a countdown doesn’t work. There are days where I just count them all as just another day I made, even if all I do is lay down. I’m giving myself a lot of grace to accept healing. I’m listening! And I’ll make hay when the sun shines. Will you pray on the 28th? I do wish to get these last two treatments done and over with as soon as possible. I love you! Thank you for everything, Pam. 💕

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  18. Karla girl, I can’t even imagine the whole ink debacle. It sounds like a slow motion cartoon though. Hopefully you are not hurt. Ink fades and your beautiful spirt shines through. Did Finley get ink on her? Hope you’re enjoying your new home. Sending love and hugs.

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    1. Oh, Lisa. Your words are precious. I couldn’t believe it. Finn escaped the ink. She watched the entire debacle. There’s STILL a little ink down the side of two nails. After scrubbing away my hands, using rubbing alcohol, and even coconut oil, and of course, bathing, lol, the palms finally faded. But my desk is great! It was good to have normal mishaps. Everything is a balance and life marches on. Just as March will march on. 💕 I’m enjoying the home. Today I took as long as a walk as I could and viewed things with a new perspective and route. I’m struggling with feet and leg swelling. I can’t nearly walk as long as before. Just day to day different so I don’t let my “pain body” do the speaking. I’ll feel it. Recognize it. React and do what I need as I want family to be able to know I’m taking care of myself. That includes being a good listener and asking for help when I need. Sometimes, though, the ink’s gonna leak. I hope you are well!! Are you at the cottage? How’s everyone? Sending love back to you. 💕🙏🏻

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      1. I always love your thinking and feeling of the world around you. We’re all home. I had a scare with a mammogram but all as good. Just dead tissue from where one of the boys probably ran into me. Life with my precious boys. I’ll take it. 😘

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      2. Oh, Lisa,…you were on my mind yesterday. I’m happy that the results were dead tissue; I’m sorry for the scare! Those boys 🥰🙏🏻💕! The odds are high so we must study diligent in our scans! Thank you for your kind response. I love you and look forward to catching up with you on other parts of our journeys. Please take care. 🙏🏻💕

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  19. Karla your newsletter is adorable! I pray that March brings you healing and happiness, and I just ordered your book. I’m bad at keeping up with everyone and had no idea you’d even written one! It looks as adorable as your newsletter. You are so inspiring! God bless you!

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    1. Good morning, Janet! Aww, thank you for your support in ordering my book! That’s so kind! And your words about my newsletter. I questioned whether or not to keep using Canva (marketing platform) since I’m not currently writing book 2. However, creating newsletters is fun and it is SO GOOD for my brain to create and learn. It took me a couple of hours just deciding layout, thoughts, and choosing elements. It warms my heart you like it! Never worry about keeping up. I understand. I feel the same way! Thank you for saying I’m an inspiration. I must give glory and credit to God for keeping me in mental shape! It’s taken years to get here! God bless you, Janet. Please take care! 💚🙏🏻

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  20. Finley, what a character and as a clsss therapy pet, Wonderful 🙂 so good to feel your buoyant spirit; am working through my cancer and side effects; still getting around; as John Denver says, ‘Some days are diamonds, some days are stone’ 🙂

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    1. John, I think of you daily. I’ve done some research on yours. I feel we’re paddling in the same boat, my friend. By the way, I love John Denver. Those lyrics sum it all up! I did have genetic testing done. It should be about two weeks (or SOONER) for results. I think deep down inside those of us with cancer want the answers. I know that stress and environment have a lot to do with our health. But after years of getting out of stressful situations, exercising, keeping faith, there was still pain,…and faith helps. Now, to know what it is relief in some ways (sounds strange I know) and to get these results may answer even more questions! Prayers, good vibes, and light and love to you across the pond on our daily walks! Specifically for your side effects, John! 🙏🏻😊

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  21. Heritage Hall

    I continue to hold you lovingly in prayer. You are such an inspiration in all your outreach with you Finley. I am certain your FB appearance awoke many to the beauty and gratitude to be found in life and an affirmation to live it more fully, Karla dear. Praying you through your March treatments and beyond…as for nothing more to do…. don’t you believe it…. you have miles to go. Love you for your courage and “yes” to Him. Take care and be filled with hope. Love and Blessings + Mary

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    1. Mary, your response warms my heart. What lovely things to say. Its my true desire that all of us experience gratitude because that transforms into kindness which is needed everywhere! Or it would help, I believe. 🥰🙏🏻 i just don’t want to be the opposite ~a diagnosis or challenge make me hard hearted or bitter. It’s a daily choice. Not always easy. But it’s what I choose. Mary, I believe in the power of prayer! Thank you so much! I have many miles to go. I’m reminded this is a marathon. Stay blessed and well. Love, Karla

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  22. March has always been my “medical month.” I don’t even remember how many birthdays I’ve spent in the hospital — at least four in the past 20 years. It also means that all my follow-ups are in March, so every March is full of doctor visits. The good news is that some have finally fallen away. I don’t need to see the oncologist anymore. I’m “cured.” Of course you are never really cured of cancer, just remitted. But I’ve now been remitted long enough so I only have to go back if something feels wrong. I still have half a dozen heart appointments every year — and my year starts in March because that’s when I had the surgery.

    I don’t know where you stand in your process. I am sure you don’t really know either. It is a long tunnel and you don’t get to turn left or right until you see light ahead. But you’re doing amazingly well, so keep on keeping on. May the light shine on you, too.

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    1. Good morning, Marilyn. I appreciate your response and kind words. I remember you and Garry in my thoughts and prayers. Your remission gives me hope. “They” (every oncology specialist and those with this cancer) say it never really goes away. Even those that have had surgery, it reappears. I hope and pray to be a brand new statistic of one out of one~complete healing. I’m realistic that my bones are brittle and being covered. I’ll have to keep putting one foot in front of the other was I can.
      I’ll remember that your March is filled with appointments. What memories of March for you. You’ve overcome so many things, Marilyn. I’m glad to hear that some appointments are no longer needed! After my March treatment, I’ll have one more in May. After that there is nothing else they can do for me. Hopefully the tumor burden will decrease. Whatever damage is done to my bone marrow or blood is what it is at this point. I chose treatment due to its high success results (this current radiation, specifically). Keeping blood counts regulated and symptoms at bay would be my goals. Praying, wishing, hoping, and positively concentrating on complete removal or disappearance of all tumors. In a couple of weeks I might know if a specific mutation could have been the reason these tumors developed (which happened at a slow rate). I pray and wish the best for you both. Thank you, Marilyn. 😊

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      1. It’s a hard road. I lost my mother, both maternal grandparents, and my brother to cancer – and I’ve had it twice, which doesn’t mean I won’t get it again. I also have friend who is 72 and got Hodgkins when her was 14. He has been in and out of remission for his entire life. He didn’t go to college because he thought he was going to die, but he’s made it to senior citizen. His cancer has come and gone, come and gone — and he had two heart surgeries too. Not easy. And we have lost many friends and family too. You do the best you can, hope the process works, hope they come up with something new. There isn’t much else you CAN do, that any of us can do. But — I’ve been in remission for 13 years. My mother died from cancer when she was 68 having been remitted for 30 years until it came back. Next Saturday, I will be 76. When I passed her death year, I thought, “Well, that’s something. I’m older than my mom ever was.” You’re on my radar. I wish there was more I could do.

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      2. Marilyn, you’ve had a hard road. And I’m so happy to know you and I’m wishing you a happy birthday early. That is the same day as my daughter-in-law’s birthday. My Mom turns 77 on the 14th. I think of your losses and the ones in my family. My Dad has overcome two cancers, congestive heart failure, and aneurysms (resulting in old-fashioned craniotomy). I believe there’s a reason you’re here, my Dad and Mom are here, and I’m still here. I’ll take each day as a gift and blessing! Thank you for your support (and to Garry, too).

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  24. You had me laughing and crying all at once. Oh my, “Lean Not Unto Your Own Understanding,” that’s rich. I am in awe of you Karla. How you stay positive, relevant, humous, and sincere in the same post. You are half way there, I continue to hold you gently in prayer, thinking of you so very often and praying for a disappearance of all tumors. Much love and hugs coming your way dear friend, C

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    1. C,…I hear you laughing! That sign has gone everywhere with me. It’s a pretty heavy little thing. It says just what I need to remember. It’s so heartwarming to read your words. It’s very humbling, too. You’re a wonderful writing role model in humor and sincerity! And teaching lessons. I learn from everyone here. I think of you wrapping me in gentle prayers and love. I’m staying so positive when I think about the tumors inside me shrinking to non-existence. I met a fellow NET patient (many on Inspire site) and he had several surgeries at stage 4 back in 2009. His came back and is growing fast again. 14 years is a long time. So I keep praying they’ll shrink enough and stop spreading. I still don’t know anyone where it’s gone to bones and they haven’t operated. I may be even more rare. I keep waiting for day someone shows up on these sites like me. In the meantime, I’ll keep my mental game string and try hard not to break my bones. Especially my funny bone!! Much love, C! Thank you!! 💕🙏🏻🥰🥰💛🦓🦓

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    1. I am receiving those Yorkshire hugs with love and gratitude. 💕💛 you and Hawklad inspire me daily. Thank you for your kind words and support. It means so much! Yes, let’s keep going! 💛💛

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